Dear Reader,
As of September 1st, 2020 I have chosen to leave both Facebook and Twitter.
There was a part of me that wanted to just slip away quietly. I wanted to disappear into the ether of the Internet in a cyber sort of Irish goodbye. However, I felt that this action would not be fair to the many people who have followed me on these platforms for years. As humans, we crave closure, and that is what I am prepared to give.
The following is a comprehensive set of reasons why I am leaving Facebook and Twitter and an explanation as to why I am choosing to also maintain Instagram for the time being.
As a note, I know that many of you get a lot out of social platforms for various reasons. I do not deny that there can be a lot of good that comes out of these platforms for certain people. They are places where people who are suffering from rare illnesses feel heard and seen, as well as places to easily mobilize groups to combat social injustice. If you are a person who is staying on social media for these (or any other reasons), I commend you. I am not, in any way, shape, or form trying to persuade you to join my position. This is merely a personal choice for which I am offering an explanation.
First, as a good Irish descendent, I need to tell a story:
My Grandpap Jones was one of the most influential, important people in my life. I lost him in 2018 to Alzheimer’s disease, but his lessons still stick with me. Many of his words run deep in my bones. My Grandpap was the master of tough conversations and of lasting, deep relationships. He was the kind of person I strive to be in my life and work.
My Grandpap also smoked these unique, cigar-like clove cigarettes. (As a note, the scent of clove invokes a really intense sense memory of my Grandpap.) It was his guilty pleasure, up until the 90’s when my very precocious little sister decided to tell him:
“Grandpap, you should quit smoking because I don’t want you to die.”
And my Grandpap quit. Cold turkey. He didn’t smoke another cigarette for the last 20+ years of his life.
My sister called my grandfather out on his bad behavior, and he did something about it. He saw the error of his ways and he made a conscious choice to do the right thing.
So this is what I endeavor to do. I want to do what I feel is the right thing.
Here are a comprehensive list of reasons why I am choosing to leave Facebook and Twitter
1. Facebook and Twitter are the most personally problematic for me.
Between all of the major platforms, I tend to only serially scroll on Facebook and Twitter. I also realized that I have been on Facebook for nearly 14 years. Something I thought would be a college fad continued well past college into my adult years and beyond. I have stopped and restarted Twitter more than a few times, but I always end up equally addicted each time. In addition, I have done my share of 30 day Facebook detoxes, and it never seems to totally kick my problematic behavior.
2. The recent anti-trust events regarding Mark Zuckerburg, CEO of Facebook.
If you’ve been listening lately to the news outlets, Mark Zuckerburg has basically admitted to extremely problematic and in some cases, truly unethical behavior. Here’s a link to watch the hearing:
https://youtu.be/PvLtwV7DFwg
Watch some of these highlights of the recent anti-trust case hearings to get an idea of what is going on with these big tech companies. It’s really terrifying that we have companies this rich and powerful in an age when so many are truly suffering.
3. The continuing polarization of the political parties in the United States.
I don’t think it’s a secret that people have gotten more polarized in the past ten years. There has been a rise in extreme left and extreme right politics, as well as really problematic issues surrounding the ethical ideas regarding what kinds of false news should be allowed and not allowed on these platforms. After reading Jaron Lanier’s book, Ten Arguments to Delete Your Social Media Accounts Right Now, I really struggled with my use of these platforms. I agree with Lanier that there needs to be a group of people who can stand on the outside and be the voice of reason. Lanier is a Silicon Valley mainstay, and has been since the 1980’s. Although I don’t agree with everything he says, I believe he makes same very poignant arguments against social media use. The most compelling argument he makes is about the algorithms and how they favor extreme negative reactions. This is why we are seeing a rise in white supremacy and the consistent spread of fake news.
4. I don’t want to be a bite-sized advice influencer.
The main reason it has taken me so long to decide to take this aggressive step is due to the conventional wisdom of artist promotion in the modern world. Modern artists, including myself, have long stated (and regurgitated our training) in the importance of social media regarding artistic promotion. Where I find issue with this is that I have found many a successful artist who is not deeply imbedded in the world of social media. Often they are producing far more interesting and compelling work. They don’t feel a constant need to feed the machine of social media. One of my favorite examples is Alexandra Franzen. Franzen is a freelance writer and entrepreneur. She left social media years ago and continues to run a thriving business despite having no social media presence. She is an example that it’s just a matter of more innovative thinking to market and promote without the use of social media.
5. I don’t want my future children to see me using these platforms.
When I think back to the example of my sister and Grandpap, I see that I was learning a very important lesson at a young age. Children see what adults do, and then they follow suit. In addition, children understand injustice. They know right from wrong and are far less inhibited than most adults in expressing their opinions. I was a public school teacher, and taught young children in various capacities for the first 8 years of my career. In my experience kids are both sponge-like and perceptive. They see exactly what we do and they make very conscious choices based on what they see. They try out behaviors on themselves because an adult they like and trust does the same thing. If another adult doesn’t agree, they test the boundary. Sometimes this is good, and sometimes not, but this is how kids learn. I do not want my future children to pick up my bad habits. Namely, I don’t want them to think that social media usage is healthy or normal. I want them to be able to see, touch, and experience the world beyond the screen of a smartphone.
6. To improve my mental health, and create a general state of happiness.
I’m tired of the constant state of disappointment and lack of motivation I live in on a daily basis, and I know I’m not alone. Cal Newport talks about this extensively in his work, especially his most recent book, Digital Minimalism. We live in a constant state of distraction, which hurts our mental agility, and therein damages our ability to have a certain quality of life. The real way to get to the other side of this is to opt out. To move into a space outside of distraction, and find real, tangible meaning in things beyond these problematic platforms.
As a final note: I get a lot out of Instagram. Selfishly speaking, it’s the only social media platform my family is on consistently. I feel like I am in much more control of my account on Instagram. I control carefully who and what I follow, and therefore my use of it is far less compulsive than Twitter and Facebook. I understand that Instagram is also a company owned by Facebook, and I will admit that my opinions may change.
However, for now I am choosing stay on Instagram. If you would like to follow me on Instagram, my handle is @operancoffee.
I am deactivating my Facebook, so you will still be able to message me, but I will not be visible on the platform. I realize that many of you used only Messenger to communicate with me, so I do not want to completely delete my account until I have more people connected with me off of these platforms.
If you were an avid follower of me on Facebook and Twitter and want to stay in touch, another option is to join my email list. I only send a newsletter on the first day of each month. You can sign up at the bottom of this post.
You are also welcome to email me directly at candice.shaughnessy@gmail.com.